Top Ten Reasons to Give Green Gifts this Holiday Season

10. If the gift recipient throws it away, at least it’s biodegradable.

9. You can replace not knowing the chemistry of parabens, with your not knowing the chemistry of rainforest botanicals.

8. Before green gifts, indigenous tribes of pygmies with access to scarce jungle herbs never owned Hollywood mansions and drove Porsches.

7. Giving green gifts helps compensate for carbon-spendy office Christmas parties: According to research carried out by Canon in 2006, over six million PCs will be left on over Christmas, consuming nearly forty million kilowatt hours of electricity.

6. Since refusal to play “gifting” is regarded as social deviancy, green gifting is payback, forcing gift recipients to “face the eco-music” with you.

5. Compensating for your bad carbon karma in the past, you can trade some good karma offsets today,

4. Because bling is hipper’ n’ nice if its no-conflict ice.

3. Because some of your girlfriends would really…